A mess of personal reflection

Questions and Answers for where to begin on the Darker Spiritual Paths.

Moderator: Akelta

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lookbeforeleaping
Posts: 9
Joined: Fri Apr 10, 2020 10:12 am
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After an unexpected and enlightening reunion with an old friend, I decided to join this forum. After being here for a bit, and for other personal reasons I thought it'd be best for me to commit to a path of self-realization; whatever the full extent of that is I'm still figuring out tbh! I've got a general idea of where I want to go, but the details are still unclear. There's so much information here, the S&S company/group is really top notch when it comes to resources, and a forum like this where people can communicate and share it all has been wonderful to me. I'm so grateful that I discovered S&S. It's been a blessing, but I've also overwhelmed myself by trying to take it all in at once.

Since I'm starting from the bottom I've felt like I needed to "catch up". My first thought was I needed to start shadow work, but then I thought about how I needed to raise my vibrations and open my third eye. I've been practicing meditation, doing affirmations, reading, taking notes... and I knew that I've been making tiny bits of progress, but not ever what I wanted.

I'm really just amazed. Spiritual paths require so much patience, so much work, so much care. I knew that, I've seen people here on this forum express these things so many times and yet it just didn't sink in. It's frustrating when you know what to do about something, but trying to actually apply that knowledge can be so difficult. You guys on your paths: You're truly incredible, and I'm so happy for all of you! From what I'm beginning to realize is that the process of figuring out what's best for you, especially in the beginning, requires so much patience/care towards yourself. At the same time though, you also have to be willing to just kick yourself in the ass every now and again to stay committed, which is also really hard! Then once you get into a comfortable place with yourself, the carpet gets pulled from beneath you and you gotta do it all over again.

There's so much to look forward to on a spiritual path, especially in the beginning, but I think it's sinking in that I need to stop looking ahead at what could be, and instead be present in the process.
I just want to hold me,
tell myself i'll be OK.
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Leo Sierra
Posts: 529
Joined: Sun Feb 16, 2020 11:27 am
Patron Deities: Pazuzu, Lillith
Your favourite Demon?: Mutilations and Crypts
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Always remember there’s no rush 🌸

You have already started to gain progress towards your goals✨

I remember when I decided to make a conscious effort to rekindle my spiritual path, I expected it to be like following a recipe book. All neatly laid out step by step.

The reality is you are learning all the time, whether you are registering your progress or not. Things that seem insignificant now you may find later on were little clues, what a lot of us call the breadcrumb trail lol

Journaling really helps show you just how far you’re come when you look back over your notes, so I’d recommend it to anyone.

But you sound like your really finding you feet on your path, so all I can say is good luck!✨
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