I need help with negative self-talk

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user2774653b
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Lokakisa wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 12:40 am
Personally, I don’t believe in the sludge theory.
I think I just have bad genetics.

Well in your case i would try everything. If these feelings don't stop and you can't get rid of them you should try different methods, maybe even the ones at which you don't believe so much.
If you are communicating with spirit world and believe in that, you should give at least a small chance to sludge/negative energies (those outside of your head) to exist. If you are entering into spiritual realms and opening portals undefended because you don't believe in darkness what is hiding there, you are doing very very bad thing. And it's quite possible that you have something at you already!

Sorry if i sound like i want to scare you now, it's not my intension. Just want to tell you that it is the fact that negative energies are usual part of spiritual world and you should consider them much more serious.

Plus, bad genetics is maybe here and triggers some illness inside you that's the fact too. But you still can heal it and cure completely!
If medicines didn't help, if hypnosis failed, shadow work too... go further. Just don't stop and never give up!

There is always the Cause of some disease, always! So it's possible to find it out and cure
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Shifa
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Lol yeah I know better than to bring up something that could put me in the looney bin. The very first counselor I saw went on a diatribe about how I needed to find Jesus so I noped out of that real quick.
You all have been so helpful, I appreciate it.

I found a great picture today that I wanted to share.
Image

From now on, I am a blueberry cat princess!
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user2774653b
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Lokakisa wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 5:56 am
Lol yeah I know better than to bring up something that could put me in the looney bin. The very first counselor I saw went on a diatribe about how I needed to find Jesus so I noped out of that real quick.
You all have been so helpful, I appreciate it.


Ok blueberry cat princess! ;) If i understand well you said you are always entering spiritual world ready and know defensive techniques? And you wanted to say that you just don't believe in sludge energy attached at you? You don't believe that some sludge is the reason for your negative self perception and consequences of it? Well if it's so, ok then! I just hope you assured yourself in it. :)

And about Jesus - ha ha - one of my friends is repeating me "Find Jesus" every time when i find myself in some sort of trouble. Last time she got pretty philosophic answer: "Can't find him, he is too successfully hiding from me." :D The point is i can't connect with "light" beings too. Was trying more then ten years without any result even positive energy feedback, so turned to Dark side asap and never regret. :devilgrin:
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Shifa
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My “superpower” seems to be stubbornness lol, I even had dreams about it!
One time I defeated Thanos all by myself, another time I was stalking people with the intimidation level of Charles Bronson, haha.
It’s like I have this stubborn shield-wall where nothing gets through.
It’s why I chose the Grumpy Cat avatar, I am much like her! Lol
On the flip side it may be what prevents me from connecting well .. I had a natal chart reading done and S. Connolly said I was pretty grounded but needed to learn to let go for spiritual work.

I just can’t wrap my mind around the sludge idea, maybe it’s possible but I know I have some hereditary conditions and I think I just inherited bad genes.
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1. Then ultimate good in this universe has to be a cat picture.

2. Stubbornness is a seriously powerful super power. Believe me. I’m raising an 8 y/o who is ZEALOUSLY committed to the path!!!

I am the adult. I keep telling myself that.

I’m pretty sure the win/loss record is not in my favor.
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CBT is a great recommendation by Alys. I had forgotten about it, but I did also recently read the book "The Healthy Mind Toolkit." Which is based on CBT. It was a good read and the exercises are decent. They definitely will help in asking questions for considering new ways of looking at your life experience. :devilthumbs:
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The' situaton you've explained resonates some-what with the statements below; however could be many factor/s so exploring those should be done first: It's more likely to be a factor only if all other methods have not worked... However one may still communicate with ***demons based on choice alone***

I' however do not use' banishment (You only need cleansing too remove reptillian energy/or a reptillian entity (sludge). A banishing ritual can be as simple as Finding a demon you' want to connect with and once a well-formed relationship is established (relaxing the' mind and inviting your patron/guardian into your space and personal energy can be a type of banishing ritual (reptillian energy can be cleared easily; by the individual it's only the entity that will need to be removed; not only from yourself if attached but also one's surrounding/s so it's not hanging around. "Request to your demon before the invitation"


Once you've found the demon you' want too work with don't request for an invitation straight away; rather learn more about this' demon and what' you would like and how you both could work together in harmony. One method of an invitation (summoning) without much effort is chanting an enn of that demon' = pure intentional communcation from there. Once the demon has appeared you may see there energy and feel it; some may actually see it's physical manifestion' however we are all different. Some demons will teach us from there on' how to summon them without an enn (as to increase our skills & so forth): But enn's work incredibly well for summoning if you' have a disability or are disadvantaged and other means of summoning are limited due to accomodation (sharing with others and not having private space.

I' hope that you feel better soon.

Hail Asmodeus. :devillust:
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I have been in that dark place myself, and once in a while the negative thoughts come back. Especially when there is some unknown fear lurking around my subconscious. I have battled with low self esteem in the past due to trauma and abuse as a child, and basically being brainwashed to believe that I was worthless and would never be successful in life or amount to anything. Recently, I started building my own business growing and selling organic produce, which through subconscious fear of failure, triggered the negative thoughts and self talk. I decided to do lots of shadow work and part of a ritual I do upon waking involves bringing up memories of a time when you truly felt loved and cared for... past, present, or even anticipated future... and I struggled so hard through this, but as I went deeper into the depths of my shadows and my past, I remembered my first puppy and the first time I saw her and the love we shared, I remembered the time when I was 5 or 6 and my abusive mother was loudly telling me to shut up and that I was nothing but a burden to her, in the grocery store checkout just because I had asked for some candy, and how this nice young couple ahead of us spoke up for me, I thought about the time in high school when I was in a play for drama club and a friends mom and dad bought me a dozen red roses to give me at the curtain call, because I was the only student whose family never watched the plays, and never did that like all the others did. I remembered many other seemingly simple, small acts of kindness from others over the years, and I feel so much gratitude for them, because without those small acts of kindness, there is no telling what could have become of me, what my attitude would have been like, or how I could have let things get to me and drag me way, way down. Think of things and moments like this and send that gratitude and love back out into the world. It comes back even more. I am thankful of the strength and insight my experiences, both good and bad, have given me. Then, I tell myself that this is the day the divine source has given me, it is mine to do as I will, so OWN THE DAY!!! I hope that sharing this helps.
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Hear me out on this..but.. To me it sounds like you need to not only rebalance your chakras,but possible rebalance your life itself. You mentioned maybe working with marbas, which is actually ironic. Fear,anxiety,ego,doubts..those are all tied to the solar plexus.

Im not saying doing a cleanse on your chakras and that would fix it..i think..in my eyes that would set you back. I identify the chakras as guages to help me balance my actual life. My train of thought is this: i think about and actually make a list of all the good symptons in my life vs the bad symptons, also including recent things i feel proud about and things i feel i handled poorly or issues i have had..then i take the list and tie everything to which chakra they corrospond to. In my personal situation,communication is a very large part of my job so i focus a lot on my throat chakra. Even when i list the good and negative things under the heading for that chakra, i read the chakra the same as a basic tarot. If the good outweighs the bad, its safe to say my chakra is probably spinning clockwise,the more negatives would probably it could be slowing and maybe about the shift direction,and then i would read that chakra like an inverted tarot. Instead of the good communication it may be bad communication. Yes i would at some point cleanse or meditate to try and clear any blockages but that is just a band aid. It would force me to think about all the external things going on that may be wearing me down and it means i would ultimately need to change my life situation to help bring myself in an overall balance. Most of us know what chakras can do and how they may he effected by external forces but a lot of people stop there and try and cleanse or banish and sometimes it works,but usually the chakra itself isnt the problem,its just an indicator of what section of your life may need to be looked at a little more deeply.
Easiest way,albeit a not so pleasant way to look at it is when you go to the bathroom.. do you wash your hands,flush the toilet,wipe yourself,do your business and leave?

Though im probably rambling,and this post is a little older,but hey give us an update :)
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I doubt anyone cares for an update. I am fine though, having found a path that works for me.
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