Offerings: Improvising
Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2016 4:45 am
When i first started working with Dark Lords there was a period of time where i literally had nothing. I mean nothing. When i say nothing, i mean nothinger than nothing. That was a terrible period for utter brokeness. I'd not long had a baby and she was the third.
I had been studying CM at the time and was pretty shocked by some of the more barbaric methods of evocation and had already decided it wasnt for me. It actually made me feel guilty how humanity had behaved towards Demons i was coming to know and love. I read the article on here about blasting rods and was further disgusted by humanity. I remember reading about Lord Mammon's eyes going dark when he was asked about his experiences with them and his refusal to discuss it in much detail.
This made me feel almost a compulsion, in my naivety, to apologise for humanity. I remember reading about things you needed for connecting, candles, incense, offerings.... It felt overwhelming to me at the time- even though these things are generally inexpensive. i knew i wasnt going to enter into this from a place of disrespect and NOT have that stuff available but i still felt i wanted to do something. This led me to brainstorming alternatives.
I had one gold candle i had bought at a boot sale for approx 50 cents (after checking stores and ebay to find they were substantially more- which was completely out of reach for me) . I came across it after telling myself i was determined to make some sort of contact. but the buck stopped there. I couldnt get anything else that were "popular" Mammon correspondences: Oud (no way in hell i could afford that) Gold (yeah right!) or anything else for that matter. Still. I was determined. i came to the conclusion that if anyone were to come to my house, since I am in England, I would offer them a traditional cup of tea. I am a huge tea drinker so that i could do. I went to my cupboard and checked the tea. I had exactly two tea bags left. I stared at a moment contemplating because I knew there was no more tea, not for a day or two and how was i going to survive kids without it.. lol... Then i said to myself "no. this is what you signed up for. its a freaking tea bag. its not Mammon's fault you drank too much."
So I made two cups of tea and lit my gold candle. I stumbled through the offering. I remember saying something to the effects of "Ok well i know im new at this, i know i dont have near the stuff "required" but... Im offering what i have. I understand Im not doing this the "right" way but thats ok! I dont actually WANT anything from you. I just read the story and I just wanna say ... well i guess i want to say we arent ALL assholes. Um... so... here's a cup of tea and one day I promise I'll have better offerings for You." Then i just sat there for a while, drinking my tea, in silence. He showed up, smiled at my pitiful offering and said "thank you. This is quite the offering when you have nothing. i like it"
I couldnt believe he had actually shown up! There was no gold! There was no Oud! There was no opulence! It was my lowly tiny cluttered by kids house! There he was! ENJOYING the offering of the tea and the crappy 50 cent candle.
It was around that time that I'd learned a valuable lesson. Yes, we should try to accommodate offerings and correspondences to the best of our ability, but sometimes you just cant. for whatever reason. But when you have an offering and it comes from the heart and its genuine, they enjoy it as much as if you HAD everything required. Another point Id like to make is if you genuinely feel, hand on heart, that an offering different to what you read is appropriate, GO FOR IT.
I had been studying CM at the time and was pretty shocked by some of the more barbaric methods of evocation and had already decided it wasnt for me. It actually made me feel guilty how humanity had behaved towards Demons i was coming to know and love. I read the article on here about blasting rods and was further disgusted by humanity. I remember reading about Lord Mammon's eyes going dark when he was asked about his experiences with them and his refusal to discuss it in much detail.
This made me feel almost a compulsion, in my naivety, to apologise for humanity. I remember reading about things you needed for connecting, candles, incense, offerings.... It felt overwhelming to me at the time- even though these things are generally inexpensive. i knew i wasnt going to enter into this from a place of disrespect and NOT have that stuff available but i still felt i wanted to do something. This led me to brainstorming alternatives.
I had one gold candle i had bought at a boot sale for approx 50 cents (after checking stores and ebay to find they were substantially more- which was completely out of reach for me) . I came across it after telling myself i was determined to make some sort of contact. but the buck stopped there. I couldnt get anything else that were "popular" Mammon correspondences: Oud (no way in hell i could afford that) Gold (yeah right!) or anything else for that matter. Still. I was determined. i came to the conclusion that if anyone were to come to my house, since I am in England, I would offer them a traditional cup of tea. I am a huge tea drinker so that i could do. I went to my cupboard and checked the tea. I had exactly two tea bags left. I stared at a moment contemplating because I knew there was no more tea, not for a day or two and how was i going to survive kids without it.. lol... Then i said to myself "no. this is what you signed up for. its a freaking tea bag. its not Mammon's fault you drank too much."
So I made two cups of tea and lit my gold candle. I stumbled through the offering. I remember saying something to the effects of "Ok well i know im new at this, i know i dont have near the stuff "required" but... Im offering what i have. I understand Im not doing this the "right" way but thats ok! I dont actually WANT anything from you. I just read the story and I just wanna say ... well i guess i want to say we arent ALL assholes. Um... so... here's a cup of tea and one day I promise I'll have better offerings for You." Then i just sat there for a while, drinking my tea, in silence. He showed up, smiled at my pitiful offering and said "thank you. This is quite the offering when you have nothing. i like it"
I couldnt believe he had actually shown up! There was no gold! There was no Oud! There was no opulence! It was my lowly tiny cluttered by kids house! There he was! ENJOYING the offering of the tea and the crappy 50 cent candle.
It was around that time that I'd learned a valuable lesson. Yes, we should try to accommodate offerings and correspondences to the best of our ability, but sometimes you just cant. for whatever reason. But when you have an offering and it comes from the heart and its genuine, they enjoy it as much as if you HAD everything required. Another point Id like to make is if you genuinely feel, hand on heart, that an offering different to what you read is appropriate, GO FOR IT.
